Instant acquittal, just add water!

For the Week of June 25, 2007
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Instant acquittal, just add water!
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It takes longer to place an order at the McDonald's drive-thru than it took Judge Knots Landing to decide to send Ridge home.

In all the years I have been watching soaps, I cannot remember such a lightening fast trial EVER! OMG!!! How could Judge Knots Landing decide all that so quickly? Insane. My order takes longer at the drive-thru at my local McDonald's than this guy took to send Ridge home. So between that and this nauseating triangle of Constantine, Phoebe and Rick I am not sure what drove me crazy more.

Well, Brooke doesn't waste any time, does she? The handcuffs weren't even off Ridge yet before she was sniffing around claiming to have forgiven him for beating Rick to a pulp. And how about the 'I really need to change my life' speech to Bridget? Haven't we heard all of this before? I know it sounded all too familiar. You know, this whole thing with her has become so predictable and sad that I find myself sitting around waiting for her to ping-pong back to Nick. Do I really WANT that to happen? I don't know. I really did love those two together and championed them forever. That had such a spark...such passion. Brooke's constant waffling, though, has spoiled it a bit for me now. If they got back together I would just sit here staring at the tube waiting for the other shoe to drop...in Ridge's lap. It's obvious that Brad has no intention of pairing Brooke with anyone but these two and that's a real shame. Maybe if Brooke had a new man, KKL would have a shot at an Emmy. New partner, new stories, and new chances for some amazing acting worthy of a golden statue. But this yo-yoing between these two will keep her from being noticed for the actress I believe she is. Lately, and I'm not being mean-I swear, it seems like she has been just phoning it in as they say.

Somebody please tell me how Ridge and his Mother can get away from dumping a dead body and covering everything up for weeks while watching an innocent man get convicted? How does this happen? Even in the soap world there should be some kind of repercussion, right? The DA sure was on the ball, too. She looked dazed and confused the entire time. And with that weak a defence, my grandmother could have been the lawyer for Ridge as well as Cricket! Did big brother Brad feel bad that Sis was sitting home doing nothing and offered her a flimsy week or so at B&B involved in the shortest court case in the history of soaps? B&B already has it's resident lawyer and we don't see enough of him as it is!

So we are supposed to believe that a nerdy janitor has the money to take Bridget out to the only restaurant in LA, Café Russe? Sure and I'm the Tooth Fairy. What is up with all this anyway? I'm annoyed just writing about this farce with the eggs!! Were they switched are weren't they? Just get to the point already!! This story has disgusted enough viewers without dragging it out like this. Make the baby Brooke's and let's all move on. WHAT you ask? Come on now...we all know that is what Brad is dying to do! He wants Brooke to be the bad girl all the time no matter what the situation and no matter how warped it is. This way everyone will accuse her of doing the switch somehow just to sabotage Nick's marriage to Taylor. Stephanie will call her a home-wrecker again and Ridge will hate Nick all the more. See? It's so predictable, so why make us wait?

So who else is tired of this show being used as a promotional vehicle for Constantly Annoying's post-Idol career? I could not believe they put plug in recently after a few episodes! Disgusting...shameful. He still needs a bath and I still don't see the appeal. Phoebe and Rick should have no problem with this guy...unless of course Mrs. Ashley Robinson decide to woo Ricky back to the bedroom. I hope Pheebs finds out who the 'other woman' was...unless she is willing to make Rick her all-important 'first', she can't compete with Ashley.

When is Eric going to dump Stephanie? Doesn't anyone else feel it coming?? I do. He looks at her with all the love of a serial killer half the time and she doesn't act like she cares anyway. Not hard to see who wears the pants (suit) in that marriage!! Hopefully we will see more of Pam and Jackie soon...I'd love to see the three-way catfight for Eric then!!!

Still all the usual missing characters...Storm, Donna, Jackie, Thorne, Felicia (though those two were allowed to come out and play for the speed-trial). It's long overdue for the Forgotten Forrester's to have some face time. Thorne has been off the canvass WAY too long. Maybe he should try to hit on Ashley and give Ridge a run for his money? I don't know...but something new has to hit this screen soon or it'll drive me to drink!!

Ok, this week's question......do you like Constantine or not? Is he helping or hurting the show? We all know how I feel. Imagine that.

The Soap Box

Marjorie in Australia says: 'As usual I am enjoying your writing. I have a question for you. I have never been to the USA but is the Café Russe the ONLY place to eat in LA? it seems that everybody eats there, even lowly lab techs!!!'

Rilani says: 'I just don't get why everybody in this show has to be miserable. Why can't a couple be happy without Brooke invading the relationship. Nick and Taylor are happy their relationship pure and untainted but here come Brooke deciding for what the 100th time that she's in love with somebody's husband. Pathetic.'

Richmond writes: 'Your storyline is too obvious. You need to hire new writers. I am so sick of Brook, Nick, Ridge, Taylor storyline. Brook needs a mature storyline. She is to old to act like a slut. Bridget should have her mother's role.' Uh...I don't write for the B&B. If I did, you would be happier!




Have a great week!!!

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Two Scoops is an opinion column. The views expressed are not designed to be indicative of the opinions of Soap Central or its advertisers. The Two Scoops section allows our Scoop staff to discuss what might happen and what has happened, and to share their opinions on all of it. They stand by their opinions and do not expect others to share the same point of view.

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