I'll have a heaping helping of veterans -- but hold the fennel

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I'll have a heaping helping of veterans -- but hold the fennel
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Two Scoops is a weekly opinion column about all things All My Children. Check in every week to see if you agree or disagree with what our columnists have to say!

Ordinarily, I would be over the moon that Josh Duhamel is returning to All My Children. Josh is now a big name in Hollywood, and the thought of the Transformers star -- a movie series that has already grossed over one billion dollars worldwide -- returning to daytime is something to celebrate. Then the realization that he's only returning to AMC because it's going off the air sweeps over me, and the thrill is gone.

The wannabe soap writer in me has already come up with scenarios about how he'll return. I don't think Leo will turn up alive -- AMC is already resurrecting two characters, and a third would be over the top. I mean, this is not The Young and the Restless. Sorry, cancellation bitterness rears its head.

Ahem. So back to the Leo return talk. If Leo were to still be alive, I would absolutely need him to be reunited with Greenlee -- no ifs, ands, or buts about it. Okay -- one but. When Josh returns in August, it's only going to be for one or two episodes. That would mean that Rebecca Budig would have to written out of the show because it wouldn't make sense for the love of Greenlee's life to come back from the dead and then not have them on-screen for the remainder of AMC's run. Unless, of course, Rebecca and Greenlee won't be around until the final episode. I suppose that's always a possibility, but I haven't heard even a rumbling about that.

And if we are raising the dead, let's have Esta Terblanche reprise the role of Gillian Andrassy. Maybe Gillian, Leo, Dixie, and Zach are all in the same hospital somewhere. Or maybe they've all been transplanted into another uter... oh wait, wrong storyline. I absolutely detested Gillian when the character was first introduced. I remember people were using the term "Eurotrash" when referring to her. There was something special, though, that took place when Gillian and Ryan got together. This is back when Ryan was still somewhat of a bad boy (and before he started yelling all the time). That whole Wildwind era was magical now that I think about it. Location shoots in Hungary, Edmund and Maria, and my girl Helga.

For whatever reason, there hasn't been that spark of magic lately. There are still characters that have great chemistry -- JR and Annie come to mind -- but it's not the stuff of legend, as the kids say. I like Tad and Cara, but they're not Tad and Dixie. I like Kendall and Griffin to a degree, but they're no Zendall. I appreciate Jack and Erica, but they're not Jack and Erica version 1.0.

I'm impressed with Christina Bennett Lind's work as Bianca -- and she had some pretty big shoes to fill. I have no idea if Eden Riegel had big feet. I'm talking strictly figurative. Eden had the groundbreaking storylines, and even though she was not the first Bianca... she is Bianca. Christina, meanwhile, has been with AMC about a year, and she is just now getting a decent storyline.

I love, l-o-v-e, love that Kendall and Bianca discussed the fact that almost all of Bianca's former lovers have not necessarily been gay. "All I'm saying is you have exceptional gaydar. You do. You had it with Lena. You had it with Maggie, Maggie's sister. Zarf -- she was not an easy one," Kendall said with a wry smile. This is the type of writing that soap fans appreciate. You know, the stuff that tells them that the writers know what they're talking about.

As for Bianca and Marissa... sigh. I don't know. I wish AMC had more time (not just for this storyline, but in general). I wonder if Tamara Braun would be receptive to a pitch to return to All My Children. She was recently let go from Days of our Lives, and maybe Reese can finally return to town to wrap up that non-event that was their divorce. I still think it was a bad idea to do all of that off-screen.

Speaking of off-screen, a lot of you wrote in last week to agree that the Jane/Erica doub-acle would have been better if we didn't know that Erica was kidnapped. But we do, so there's nothing we can do about that. Jane's not-quite-there impersonation of Erica has had some hilarious moments. Who in the world thinks it's a good idea for a recovering alcoholic to order booze in public? While on the "who in the world" topic, who in the world was the little girl in Jane's picture? In the past, when there have been evil twins, amnesia, or stolen identities, the initials were always a clue. Remember Maria Grey was Maureen Gorman? Janet Green was Jane Cox (Okay, so just the first name there). Are there any characters from AMC's past that have the initials "J.C." or a similar first name? I'm thinking...

While I think of names, it's your turn to fire off some email. What storylines have captured your interest? Which past stars do you want to see return to AMC before it airs its final episode? Click here to send me email. I'm looking forward to reading from you.

Here's a taste of what readers had to say last week. Do I detect a bit of fennel?

    • As a very long time viewer of AMC, I have found that when a long-ago character is mentioned, not once, but twice in a day or so, it means that are about to show up again. [Last week] Mary Smythe (Greenlee's mother) was mentioned twice in a conversation between Jack and Greenlee. Could Jane be Mary Smythe? -- Jane

    • Doesn't it bother anyone that the free clinic is located in Cara and Jake's tent in the Sudan? I know that the show has only a few more months left, but couldn't they come up with an actual room with walls? -- Sue

    • Watching today's episode I got fixated on the white board behind Jake -- looked like Dr. Ponce was scheduled to perform a colonscopy on a patient and then there was a page: "Dr. Ponce to Delivery." Goodness that's a doctor that takes care of business. -- Dale

Remember that the Daytime Emmys air on June 19 -- and I'll once again be on the Red Carpet in Las Vegas, bringing you interviews with the biggest names in daytime television. This year, we're going to have some amazing video, and I'll be joined by two-time Emmy winner Martha Byrne. Because of all the Emmy insanity, next week's column will be written by Liz Masters. I hope you'll tune in to check out her column and show her some of the love that you show me every week. I love all of you -- and Go AMC!

dan

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Two Scoops is an opinion column. The views expressed are not designed to be indicative of the opinions of Soap Central or its advertisers. The Two Scoops section allows our Scoop staff to discuss what might happen and what has happened, and to share their opinions on all of it. They stand by their opinions and do not expect others to share the same point of view.

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